If you’re someone who shows up for others — advocating, supporting, listening, caregiving, volunteering, or simply holding space — there’s a good chance you’ve been told (or told yourself):
“Just push through.”
“Other people have it worse.”
“I’ll rest later.”
Sound familiar?
Activists, helpers, and caregivers often carry big hearts and heavy loads. Caring deeply about people and communities is powerful… and it can also be exhausting.
This month at Inspired Healing Therapy, as we explore love in all its forms, we want to pause and talk about a kind of love that often gets pushed to the bottom of the list:
self-love as sustainability.
Not bubble baths, although those can be nice too.
Real, everyday care that helps you keep going without burning out.
Why Burnout Is So Common for Helpers
When you’re constantly giving, supporting, and advocating, your nervous system is often in a state of high alert.
You may notice:
Feeling emotionally drained
Trouble resting (even when you have time)
Irritability or overwhelm
Guilt when you try to take breaks
A sense that there’s always more to do
This isn’t a personal failure.
It’s what happens when caring humans live in a world that asks for constant output. A few activists highlight their experiences in this article on activism and self-care.
You’re not alone. Our bodies and minds need moments of safety, rest, and regulation not just productivity.
Self-Love as Community Care (Not Selfishness)
There’s a common myth that focusing on yourself takes away from others.
In reality, caring for yourself allows you to show up with more presence, clarity, and compassion.
Self-love doesn’t mean:
❌ Ignoring the world’s problems
❌ Only focusing on yourself
❌ Never feeling tired or frustrated
It does mean:
✔ Listening to your body
✔ Setting boundaries with care
✔ Taking breaks before burnout hits
✔ Letting yourself be human
When your nervous system feels supported, you’re better equipped to support others too.
Think of it like charging your phone. No one expects it to run forever at 2%.
Gentle Ways to Practice Self-Love (That Actually Feel Doable)
Self-love doesn’t have to be dramatic or time-consuming. Often, it shows up in small moments.
Here are a few simple, realistic ideas:
1. The Two-Minute Pause
Set a timer for two minutes.
Breathe slowly.
Let your shoulders drop.
That’s it.
Your nervous system will thank you.
2. Meet a Basic Need
Ask yourself:
“Am I hungry, thirsty, tired, or tense?”
Sometimes self-love is just water, a snack, a stretch, or rest.
3. Practice a Gentle Boundary
It might sound like:
“I can’t take that on right now.”
“I need a break.”
“Let me get back to you.”
Boundaries aren’t walls. They’re care.
4. Offer Yourself Compassion
Try replacing harsh self-talk with:
“I’m doing the best I can.”
“It makes sense that I’m tired.”
“I don’t have to do everything today.”
Small shifts in language can create big emotional relief.
For more ideas like these, check out this Self-Love and Self-Care: A Guide for Activists from Planned Parenthood.
When Helping Starts to Hurt
Sometimes burnout runs deeper than needing a nap or a day off.
If you’re feeling:
Chronically overwhelmed
Emotionally numb
Anxious or depressed
Resentful or guilty for resting
Like you’ve lost joy in things you once loved
These can be signs your nervous system and emotional health need extra support.
Working with a therapist can help you:
✨ Process stress and overwhelm
✨ Learn regulation tools
✨ Set healthier boundaries
✨ Reconnect with yourself
✨ Prevent long-term burnout
You deserve care just as much as the people you support.
A Softer Definition of Self-Love
At Inspired Healing Therapy, we like to think of self-love as:
Listening.
Resting.
Repairing.
Being kind to yourself when things feel hard.
Not perfection.
Not doing it all.
Just caring for yourself with the same compassion you offer others.
You Don’t Have to Carry It All Alone
If you’re a helper or caregiver feeling stretched thin, you’re not weak. You’re human.
And support is available. If you would like to get started, our therapists are ready to help.
Therapy can be a space where you don’t have to be the strong one, the fixer, or the caregiver.
You get to just be you.
